Zach Wilson/The Falcon Sophomore Danica Humphries (right) listens while freshman Nate Musson talks about how he overcame his struggle with homosexuality at a community forum Thursday night. The event was designed to raise awareness about homosexuality one year after Equality Ride visited campus.

Chris Kattenhorn figured out that he was gay while attending SPU but chose to keep his sexuality closeted until after his 2003 graduation.

"I never had a fear of professors or the administration finding out," he said, "I was afraid of other students [finding out]."

Now an openly gay public defender in the cities of Kent and SeaTac, Kattenhorn spoke as a panelist in the "Equality Ride Plus One" forum held Thursday evening in the science building. The forum looked at how SPU has changed in its views of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) individuals and where the conversation about homosexuality has gone.

In the years since he was a student, SPU has become more willing to talk about LGBT issues, Kattenhorn said. This discussion panel and multiple campus newspaper editorials are signs that the community is more open to dialogue, Kattenhorn said.

Last April, SPU was visited by Equality Ride, a bus tour of LGBT individuals that travels to conservative Christian campuses to raise awareness about discrimination faced by gay students.

Thursday's forum, which drew between 50 and 60 students, sought to address the changes that have occurred in the one year following Equality Ride's visit, said SPU senior and forum panelist Beth Van Dam.

Van Dam, who helped organize the event, wanted the forum to include a variety of opinions on LGBT issues.

"I think my goal of getting a wide range of people there definitely happened, especially in the panel," she said in an interview.

One opinion shared was that of Nate Musson, a freshman majoring in political science. Musson grew up in a conservative, fundamentalist home and said he struggled with same-sex attraction from when he was little and throughout high school. He viewed, and still does view, homosexuality as a sin and therefore incompatible with his Christian beliefs.

"I was utterly controlled by these desires, but because I was in a conservative environment, I was never allowed to act on them, which I thank God for," he said.

After graduating high school, Musson attended a Christian discipleship school in Texas called the Honor Academy. Though he was not originally planning to share his same-sex attraction with the staff, Musson did open up about his struggle and was embraced by the people at Honor Academy, he said.

"They were not accepting of the sin I was in, but they were very accepting of me," Musson said.

Musson, who currently attends a charismatic church, said that Christianity is an important part of his life and feels that God has brought complete healing to his heart.

He is now in a relationship with a girl he hopes to marry one day.

"I definitely consider myself heterosexual now," he said.

Though Musson was not at SPU when Equality Ride came, the self-proclaimed "news junkie" followed their tour and the reception they received from different universities. While he does not condone homosexuality, he said it was good for Christian universities to allow the riders on campus to share their stories.

While Musson said he has found wholeness in no longer having same sex attraction, Van Dam has had a different experience.

"My freedom has been in becoming an out gay woman instead of an ex-gay woman," she said.

Van Dam described the Equality Ride visit as one of the best days of her life.

"I saw that suddenly I was going to have a voice, and they were going to tell my story to campus."

Van Dam is a leader in Haven, the SPU group for LGBT awareness that has been struggling to achieve club status over the past year. The group still meets on campus once a week, Van Dam said.

Because she feels that discussions about homosexuality should be addressed by the Christian community, Van Dam has applied to be a member of the 2008 Equality Ride. She is still waiting to see if her application has been accepted.

When Jeff Jordan, the dean of student life, and Eric Mill, last year's campus ministry coordinator, heard about Equality Ride coming to campus, both were worried about how the campus would receive the riders.

"I was scared we wouldn't be a welcoming community," Mill said.

Jordan, who arranged for the riders to have student hosts during their visit, said that the university knew that the Equality Ride was coming one year before they arrived on campus.

Jordan mentioned that this was not the first time the topic of homosexuality came up at SPU, but the university still had some decisions to make in working with the riders.

"We had to ask ourselves, 'How do we address an issue that is very real and that needed to be engaged with?'" Jordan said.

Both Jordan and Mill said they were pleased with the way that the campus responded to the Equality Ride visit last year.

When asked if his interaction with the riders helped him come to a conclusion about the morality or immorality of homosexuality, Mill said he found that "humanity is immoral. It's not about the idea of homosexuality being moral or immoral. It's not an issue of lifestyle. We're all trying to get through this thing, but we're all the same."

Jordan has been working with Haven in their pursuit to gain club status. During the forum, he addressed the incident when students threw water balloons from Upper Gwinn into Martin Square, where a display was set up and students were gathered in honor of the Day of Silence on April 25.

Jordan, who was walking through Martin Square at the time, said he got wet from the water balloons and immediately ran up to the third floor of Gwinn to confront the students responsible.

These students stated that they were unaware of the nature of the Day of Silence display and were aiming the balloons at their friends, he said. They have since signed statements saying that their actions were not aimed at the Day of Silence, Jordan said.

Panelist Danica Humphries, a sophomore, feels that the church is often detrimentally silent on LGBT issues. This past summer, Humphries became involved with the worship team in a church she had just begun to attend.

At that time, Humphries was dating a man who was bisexual. When her new church found out about this, Humphries was never again contacted to take part in the worship team, she said. Because of Humphries' decision to date a bisexual, her family considered kicking her out, taking away her car, and not paying for SPU, she said. She sees a connection between the church's influence and her family's decision, Humphries said.

Though the relationship with her family has gotten a little better, Humphries said the Christian community needs to be more welcoming towards the LGBT community. SPU still has a way to go also, Humphries said.

"I feel like the church had engrained something in it that homosexuality is not to be discussed," Humphries said.