Nicholas Holderman/The Falcon

If there's one thing that requires men and women coming together, it's sex. Yet whenever there are sex discussion events within Christian circles, genders are almost always separated. Men and women are corralled into different rooms to talk about fornication in segregation.

Gender-specific sex discussions often look something like this: men are told to stop acknowledging their sex parts so frequently, while women are told that it's okay to start acknowledging their sex parts.

Students often leave these forums wondering what the other gender was discussing in the separate, barricaded room. They are also sent the message that women and men need to separate information about sex. Or worse, that it is not appropriate for men and women to openly discuss the issue, because sex should be left shrouded in darkness and secrecy.

These discussions further stereotypes of sexual issues that men and women deal with. Even when planning committees are organizing these events, they are forced to cast a stereotype as they decide what men will discuss and what women will discuss. Rarely do men and women discuss the same topics, which gives students the impression that sex holds different connotations for each gender.

It is true that some sexual issues seem gender specific. Most women probably don't fret over their premature ejaculation. For these specific topics, maybe each gender would feel more comfortable in separate discussions.

Bekah Grim is a junior majoring in creative writing

However, at the end of these separate discussions, both genders should come together to dialogue. A topic like premature ejaculation may only immediately pertain to men, yet the reason that it is even a problem for men is because of the effects it can have on an inter-gender relationship.

Separate sex forums for men and women are ineffective because they don't take into account that the issues discussed have a bearing on not just women and men as individuals, but how men and women function in a sexual relationship.

For instance, if someday you find your husband hovering over the computer looking at pornography, it becomes an issue for you as a wife and woman, as well as for your husband. If you haven't been educated on the factors concerning the problem of men and pornography, it might lead you to assume negative things. Instead of understanding the many variables that are involved in the issue, you might be left wondering if this struggle meant you personally failed in some way.

On the other side of the matter, if a husband found his wife looking at pornography one day, he might think it abnormal because of the stereotype that only men look at pornography. Inter-gender discussions could help clear up stereotypes like these that come out of the silence between genders.

Kat Hall, a freshman in Ashton, agreed that inter-gender sex discussion would be helpful on campus for clearing up misconceptions about sex.

"I would rather go to a mixed forum. Sometimes all-girl forums start to sound like a support group. Instead of numerous personal testimonies, they could focus on sexual biology and anatomy or current issues," Hall said.

SPU junior Jackie Cramer said, "It is obvious that stereotypes about men and women exist concerning their sexual nature. It could be like any reconciliation dialogue that serves to open up lines of communication and debunk perceived myths."

If the SPU community is not able to hear both genders' views, fears and questions about sex, students will continue to get only one side of the story. Without being able to openly dialogue about sex, silent tensions will cause women to reach for Cosmopolitan magazine and men to study the pages of Maxim for sex information they are too afraid to ask out loud.

It's time to stop herding men and women into separate rooms to talk about sex because it's more comfortable or the traditional norm.

We don't need to be so afraid to talk about sex together. It is a private act, but it is not a secret act. It is worth dealing with a few initially awkward moments if it means that someday you will be better equipped to address the issues that affect you and your relationships.