It’s a tough world out there

Not granted a speaking appointment at the graduation ceremonies this year despite my obvious reputation as a qualified, albeit na•ve and short-sighted, orator, I longed for a place to impart my wisdom. Speaking, as it were, never was my milieu. I had a high school valedictorian speech disallowed for content reasons, I stuttered terribly in […]

The Runaround

As the sun set one beautiful evening last week, I couldn’t help but think that I have a lot in common with the largest star in our galaxy. For one, I am hot. Also, similar to solar vapor, I give off an alluring air that is equal parts confidence and Old Spice Red Zone. But […]

The Runaround

Second place is the first loser. Which makes this column — with one more column to go before the end of the year-a potential heap of poop. But as tragically possible as that last sentence is, at least it helps me to understand the plight of several sports teams. For instance, this past weekend was […]

The Runaround

With 12 credits this quarter — five of which are online, two of which account for this meager column and five more of which actually kind of sort of challenge me — I have a lot of free time on my hands. As such, I have taken to blowing my time on such mindless activities […]

The Runaround

Always concerned with making myself look good, I feared for the worst when sports columnist responsibility and lack of good story ideas beckoned me to write about the NBA playoffs. My fear stemmed in large part from the fact that I did not know enough about the NBA to make a coherent article. So in […]

The Runaround

Poker is one of the fastest growing fads in our nation. There’s only one problem: It’s not a sport. For as popular as poker is, and despite the fact that it boasts great competition, there are still a few criteria that poker fails to reach in order to be listed as a sport. First of […]

Classic finds home on DVD

Here’s an interesting take on the different levels of annoyance toward people who talk during movies. If the person is a large, hairy man who spills popcorn on you and blows bubbles in his Pepsi, there is a high level of annoyance. If the person is an attractive member of the opposite sex, there is […]

The Runaround

Cedric Benson and I are a lot alike. We are both college students — Benson a senior at Texas, myself a senior at a school people like to pronounce "spew." We both have an affinity for football — Benson enjoys playing the sport, I enjoy living vicariously through possession receivers. We both have dreadlocks — […]