New image could benefit America

The end of America is coming, sooner than you think. Tired of being American, the United States has decided to become Afghan, as soon as 2002 Independence Day celebrations have ended. The decision was based on already-budgeted firework displays, and on the advice of Ann Landers and a committee of stress analysts. "A mass identity […]

Freshman overcomes injury

Six months after a nasty broken ankle, freshman Kari Kelly was at SPU ready to be a Falcon gymnast. "I landed wrong," she said, describing her injury that occurred during practice in her senior year of high school. "My bone came out of the skin, and I tore everything in my foot possible to tear." […]

Last-second shot beats Jacks

With a share of the Great Northwest Athletic Conference title on the line and before a crowd of nearly 2,000 on Saturday night, the Falcons beat Humboldt State on a 22-foot jump shot by junior guard Maurice Cato at the buzzer. "I didn’t have time to think," Cato said. "The opportunity presented itself, I reacted […]